Monday, May 21, 2012

When Callings Collide

When this post goes live, I will be at Ridgecrest getting ready for the first full day of classes at the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference.

I’m both excited and terrified.

Excited to hang out with writing friends from all over the country. Terrified because my husband and kids will be doing life without me this week. This is the hardest part for me. Desiring to be the best wife and mother I can be—which is my number one calling—while also following God’s call to write for Him.

My dad, sister, mother-in-law, and several friends, are taking time off from work and rearranging their schedules to help with childcare. It puts a lot of pressure on a girl to have people who love her and believe in her so much that they are willing to seriously inconvenience themselves on her behalf.

I don’t like inconveniencing people.

Which is why I’ve meal planned, done laundry, cleaned out cabinets, and generally made myself a basket case, all in an effort to make this week go as smoothly as possible for the ones I’m leaving behind.

But the resistance has been fierce. Anything I touch turns into a disaster.

I am the anti-Midas.

Try to move some furniture? Scratch the floor.
Try to potty train a child? Clean the floors—a lot.
Try to put up a baby gate to protect our tiny mountain climber? You guessed it, fiasco.

I can’t think clearly, I’m exhausted, overwhelmed, and questioning my own sanity. What on earth made me think leaving my kids for five days was a good idea?

It took a dear friend who pointed out that “Satan is on the prowl this week” to wake me up. My enemy has succeeded in distracting me, keeping me so busy that I’m missing the bigger battle.

Because there is most definitely a bigger battle.

I’m not leaving my family, asking people to jump through hoops to make it possible, and working myself into a frenzy to prepare just so I can chill out for five days.

I truly believe that I’m called to write, and that I’m supposed to be at Blue Ridge from May 20-May 24.

I have no idea why.

I don’t know what God has in store for me this week. I don’t know how He plans to use my writing to further His kingdom. I don’t know if I’ll ever see a book with my name on it, or if His plan for my writing will affect people on a different scale.

I do know that whatever He’s doing, Satan has caught a whiff of trouble in the air.

Seems like the enemy has noticed that I climbed out of the boat.


I covet your prayers both for me and my family this week. When mommy has a calling, the family does too. In my case, even extended family and friends have taken this calling and made it their own! I’m so thankful for all the support and love they show me. Please pray that we will keep our eyes focused on the One who said “Come” and not on the circumstances and difficulties in our way.

If you want to follow my Blue Ridge experiences, I’ll be posting to Facebook and Twitter (#BRMCWC) during the week.


Lori Stanley Roeleveld said...

You are called to nurture your family and to write. Love that you're trusting God, staying faithful to His call, and believing He can negotiating the intersections and blind curves!