What I Learned in August

It’s been too long since I did a “What I Learned” post, so this month it’s really more of a “What I’ve Learned in 2017” rather than just in August. :) 

1. I need to be in a Bible study, even if it means doing it on my own. When I started homeschooling both boys I had to give up my Bible study group at church and I’ve missed it. I did a study on the book of Jonah this summer and it rocked my world. I didn’t make it to a single meeting of the group that was doing it, but it was still life changing and I need to do that kind of thing more often. I haven’t nailed down what I’m doing this fall because my FB feed was full of suggestions! But I’ll be choosing something soon. 

2. Apple watches are A.MAZ.ING. I was the biggest skeptic when they came out. Why on earth does anyone need to check their email on their wrist? But then I discovered how handy it is to be able to glance at it and decide if a text or call is worth stopping what I’m doing. Now, I can leave my phone on the kitchen counter all day and not be worried about missing an important call from Emma’s school. I’ve worn it every day since I got it. It actually helps me NOT have my phone in my hands all the time, and that’s a big deal to me.

3. Teaching is fun. It’s exhausting, too. This applies to homeschooling, but I’m talking about teaching adults about writing. :) I’ve had the opportunity to teach at a couple of conferences this year, as well as an all-day Scrivener workshop. I’m surprised by how much I enjoy it. I get to co-teach a workshop at the ACFW (American Christian Fiction Writers) conference later this month and then another Scrivener class later in the fall. I’m really looking forward to both. 

4. “Out with the old, in with the new” is something I should try more often. After fifteen years of looking at the same bedding, we bit the bullet and got a new bed, furniture, and bedding for our bedroom. I know for some of you this is something that happens every few years and you cannot imagine looking at the same stuff for a decade and a half, but I naturally resist change of any kind and it shows up in weird places—like re-doing rooms. My husband resists spending money, which also shows up in weird places like re-doing rooms. Between the two of us, we can shut down a room makeover in a hurry. :) 

We still need to paint and get curtains, a few pictures, etc. But the difference is amazing. It reflects our style and our sensibilities and is a restful place to be. Which is what bedrooms are supposed to be like, right? 

It was a lot of work—a lot of hours spent shopping, re-organizing, and using Allen wrenches on furniture that came in boxes. And there were a few times when I wondered if it would be worth it. But it totally was. 

5. Early morning exercise is awesome. I claim I hate it. Because I do. Except I don’t. I’m coming to terms with the fact that the 5:30 a.m. class is the best one for me. My entire day goes better when I get it knocked out first thing. Also, I workout at a CrossFit box with no A/C. It’s summertime in the south so it’s already hot and muggy at 5:30 a.m. By 4 p.m. no one in their right mind should be doing burpees and box jumps. I have lots of friends who do, but for me it’s worth the 5 a.m. wakeup call to get it over with before the sun comes up. 

I’d love to know what you’ve learned lately. Are there any fun “life hacks” you’ve recently discovered? Let’s talk about them in the comments.

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God Calls Everyone to Care, But . . .

The image flooded social media and I couldn’t look away. A little boy covered in dust, dazed, alone, having been pulled from the rubble of a building. A little boy who could have been my Drew. Same size. Same age.

What if that had been Drew?

What if that was our life?

My questions bubbled into lament. Why, God? How can You stand it? How can You let it go on? And how can You tolerate those of us who go on about our lives as if there is nothing seriously messed up about our world?

I sobbed. I raged. I begged God to show me what I could do. 

I know He calls average moms to extraordinary work. They visit a slum, a quarry, a certain street, and nothing is ever the same. They begin ministries that save thousands of lives from slavery and starvation. I could do that, too.

I was willing. As a teenager I was ready to go anywhere. Learn any language. Take any risk to spread the gospel. I was standing on my tiptoes in the dugout, ready to take my place in the lineup. But I never got the call. Not for that, anyway.

I went to college. Got married. Got a good job. Had a daughter, then a son. I started writing, and we had another son, and then the writing took off and I got published! 

And then God led our family to homeschool the boys. Homeschooling! I did NOT see that coming but, okay. 

I continue to homeschool and write and God has continued to bless those pursuits, but as I sat there bawling my eyes out over a very real child halfway around the world, I had to ask . . . What about the big stuff, God? What can I do?

Crickets. 

(You know how it is when your kids have really ticked you off and you don’t speak so you can avoid saying something you’ll regret? Yeah…this silence may have been a much holier version of that…read on).

I slept that night with the prayer of, “Even so, come quickly Lord Jesus,” on my lips. In the days that followed I wrestled with the relative ease of my life. I live in a nice house in a safe part of town. I live in a part of the country where my faith is rarely questioned, much less mocked. I homeschool two of my three children. That’s about the most radical thing I do, and where I live, it’s not that radical. I write inspirational romantic suspense. My stories have a message of faith, and at some point there will be some nasty reviews about them because of that, but so far I’ve suffered nothing that could be called persecution for my faith.

But I would risk all of that if God would just put me in the game!

God let me wrestle with why He has put me here, doing what are relatively easy things for the Kingdom, when I am so willing to do more . . . until He’d had enough. 

That’s when He pierced me with this...

“What makes you think I love your neighbors any less than those people around the world? When did you decide the people in your city didn’t need to hear about me? Or that the people who read your books don’t need to hear the Truth in exactly the way you’re telling it? Have you forgotten who I AM? 

What makes you think I don’t already have you doing something *big* - or it could be big if you’d quit worrying about why I haven’t moved you to the Middle East and start focusing on the ministry you have in your own home and on your own doorstep. What could you do for My Kingdom if you cried as much over the lost, broken and hurting in your own sphere of influence as you are over that child?” #Dropsmic

I’ve been living with that reprimand for a while now and I’ve realized something.

God calls everyone to care, but God doesn’t call everyone to go. At least not the way we usually define "go."

Sometimes He calls us to stay. To stay in our nice subdivisions and be bold about our faith. To stay in our comfortable churches and use them as the launching pad for reaching our communities. To stay in our jobs and be a light to our coworkers. To exhibit God’s love on the soccer field and in the rehearsal hall. Sometimes he calls us to stay in the house writing a book and to trust Him that it will somehow play a role in the larger Story He is writing. 

He calls us to stay put and to be intentional about entering into what He is already doing. Right where we are.

This isn’t a call to stick our head in the sand and pretend that evil doesn’t exist. 

Staying put doesn’t mean staying oblivious and staying put doesn't mean we don't cry out to God on behalf of our broken world. It doesn't even mean that we don't continue ask Him what He would have us do.

But if He tells us to stay, we need to remember that wherever we are called to be—it matters. 

We can be sure God has important work for us to do. What might He do through us if we realized that as far as He’s concerned, we all have a big role to play? That no location or ministry trumps another? That whether we are serving in Africa, Aleppo, Alabama, or the Annual Company Softball Tournament, if we are being obedient to His call, then our work has eternal significance?

He has called all of us to extraordinary work. 

I don’t know about you, but I need to get busy.

Colossians 4:17b - See that you fulfill the ministry that you have received in the Lord. (ESV)

I’d love for you to leave a comment and share how and where God is using you, and how you are joining Him in His work whether it’s in your own home or around the world. 

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What I Learned in July

How is it possibly already the end of July? How? 

Anyway - it's been a C-R-A-Z-Y month, but here are a few things I learned in July.

Dollywood has an amazing guest assistance program. If you travel with a child with any sort of disability, you know how difficult it can be to face long lines, loud crowds, and staring patrons. We spent two days at Dollywood this month and we were very impressed by their attention and care for their guests with disabilities. A quick stop at the ride accessibility office provided us with a card that gave us easy (and fast) access to all the rides, as well as a phone number we could call if we needed anything, or wanted access to Dollywood's new calming room. The Calming Room was fabulous. Thirty minutes of peace, quiet, books, comfy places to sit, and a break from the crowds. It was just what our girl needed to get through the rest of the day. Who am I kidding…it didn't hurt me, either!

Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Cacao Nibs are amazing. They are my new favorite writing snack. They are tiny, it doesn't take much for me to feel like I've had enough (unlike milk chocolate which I can eat in large quanities and still want more), and they have the crunch from the cacao nib that makes them simply delightful. I'm a fan!

Lavender Oil is the BEST thing for burns. I promise I'm not going to turn into an essential oil evangelist, but despite my original skepticism toward them I have been blown away by how well Lavender Oil works on sunburns and kitchen burns (which I have a LOT of experience with). Our youngest managed to get a pretty bad burn after a day at the lake. I slathered him in some coconut oil that I mixed with the lavender. No complaints, no drama, and next morning, no redness. Even my husband was amazed. I keep Lavender in my kitchen for when I splatter myself with grease or attempt to reach into the oven and burn myself on the rack (don't ask). It works every time. 

Chocolate Avocado Smoothie - I can't call this health food because people have checked the calorie/sugar counts and shared them in the comments (just look), but this is way better for me than a milkshake, and it satisfies my sweet tooth. Even better, my kids hate it. :) Probably because of the flax seed, or maybe it's because I don't use as much honey as called for so it's not super sweet. Regardless, I don't have to share! 

Buy the big pot. I have several recipes that are part of our regular meal rotation. I make them often, and I usually double the recipe and freeze whatever is left to save myself some time and trouble later. The problem has been that I haven't had a big enough pot to double the recipe without having to divvy it up into multiple pots or deal with lots of spillovers. I finally broke down and bought a BIG pot. WHY did I wait to do this? It made meal prep so much more enjoyable and cleanup so much easier. Take my advice…by the big pot. 

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My Rules for the Rest of my Summer Vacation

As a kid the main advantage I could see to summer vacation was the virtually unlimited reading time it provided. But by July, I was ready for routines, new textbooks, and bouquets of freshly sharpened pencils.

Fast forward a few years, and I’m still not the biggest fan of summer vacation. I appreciate the break from the routine, while simultaneously craving the return of it. I love the potential of a slower pace to our days, but find myself fighting the tendency to fill them to the brim with activity. I enjoy hanging out at the pool or the lake with friends, but dread the laundry that follows. 

I want my kids to look back on their summers with delight. Lightning bugs. Popsicles. Staying up late. Sleeping in (although one of mine may NEVER sleep past 6:15…sigh). But I also want to reclaim some of the joy of summers for myself. I want to read more. Write more. Play more. Stress less.

How does a 42-year-old wife, mom of three, author, homeschooling kind of mom actually do this?  

Honestly, I have no idea. But I know that it's the middle of July and while I do have a few truly good things to show for the past few weeks, I can see a disturbing trend. One that involves me spending too much time on my phone and not enough time with my nose in a book. Too much time performing tasks and not nearly enough time playing games. 

I do have things I need to accomplish over the next 6 weeks, but I’m thinking there has to be a way to cross off some big to-do list items AND roll into September (it’s really mid-August but I’m in denial) feeling refreshed and ready to tackle a new school year.

I know for myself that a BIG part of my problem is screen time. This is tricky for me, because the whole “writing thing” kind of requires screen time. But you know what it doesn’t require? Facebook. 

I love Facebook, but I’ve come to realize that my social media time has gotten out of hand.

So I’ve decided to run a little experiment and I’m telling you about it in order to keep myself accountable. You may have seen this handy little sheet that has made the rounds on Pinterest and Facebook where the kids in the house have a list of things they have to do every day before they get any screen time. (Yes, I do appreciate the irony here). Anyway, I’ve made a few modifications for myself and my life and I’m going to give it a shot for a few weeks and see if I can tell a difference.

Here are my Rules for the rest of my Summer Vacation (Rules apply when I'm at home. There are NO rules when I'm at the lake or in the mountains!) --  

Before you start surfing Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, or Instagram for non-work related matters you must:

** Spend some time in the Word.

** Make your bed.

** Hydrate—this means WATER not coffee—not that I won’t also have coffee!

** CrossFit (unless it’s an intentional rest day - I can’t hit the box 7 days a week).

** Read for thirty minutes - for fun, not heavy reading.

** Write for thirty minutes.

** Clean a room (ha - like this even needs to be on the list).

** Tackle one “project” for thirty minutes.

** Do one load of laundry (sigh).

** Play with the kids—go to the pool, throw the football, shoot some hoops, read a book, draw with chalk pastels (I’m terrible at it but the kids like it), color.

** Make contact with a friend—write a letter (imagine!), text, call.

If the whole day happens and I never open my Facebook page and don’t find any cool pins on Pinterest? I think I’d be okay with that. 

I’m curious how you handle screen time - not for your kids, but for yourself? If you have any awesome tips or tricks, a funny story or an inspiring one, please share!

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When You Want to be Somewhere Else with your Writing

Not my son, but an accurate representation of his gloominess!

I felt so sorry for him.

My youngest son was surveying the scene on his first morning of day camp—and he was not impressed. Kids were running around playing with hula hoops, bouncy balls, Legos, Crayons, and board games. It was a kids’ paradise in there, but the mutinous expression on his face refused to budge.

He’d been okay an hour earlier. He was excited about this new opportunity, until we dropped his older brother off at a different day camp. One for kids a bit older. One with cheering counselors, multiple inflatables, and a climbing tower.

From the minute we climbed out of the van, my little guy was in full revolt. He dragged his feet, he pouted, he glared at everyone we encountered. He wanted to go home and not go to his camp at all.

As I stood at the back of the room and watched him try to come to terms with his reality, my heart broke. There was so much awesomeness in front of him, but he couldn’t see it because He Wanted to be Somewhere Else.

Maybe you can relate?

Your blog is getting great attention, but you don’t want to be a blogger. You want to be a speaker.

• An editor is interested in your devotional, but no one will take an interest in your historical.
• You’ve found success with freelance work, but now you don’t have time for your epic fantasy.
• Your poetry has won awards, but no one will look at the Bible study you’ve poured your heart into.
• Or maybe you’ve been published with a small press, but you yearn to be affiliated with one of the big houses.

You Want to be Somewhere Else.

It's the first Thursday of the month so I'm posting over at The Write Conversation...click on over to read more...

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What I Learned in June

I really enjoy taking a few minutes to think back over my month and share a few of the things I’ve learned. (This idea is from both Emily P. Freeman and Modern Mrs. Darcy). 

Here goes:

1. I am incapable of being calm when surprised with good news. (Or . . . I *will* make a goober out of myself when something awesome happens). 

On June 17^th, my phone rang and even though I didn’t recognize the number, I answered it. When the voice on the other end of the line said, “This is Casey Herringshaw . . . ” Well, honestly, I don’t exactly know what she said after that because there was only one reason for her to be calling me and I couldn’t quite let myself believe that it was possible until she confirmed she was calling to tell me that Covert Justice was a finalist in the Short Novel category of the Carol Awards. I don’t actually know what I said after that, but there was a lot of laughing (I’m calling it laughing…Casey might call it maniacal giggling). Other that that, it’s pretty much a blur—although that might have been because of my tears of joy. I generally try to act like a professional, but I must say, it was way more fun to enjoy the good news. Which leads me to the next thing I learned…

2. It is REALLY hard to keep good news a secret! I had to wait 10 days before I could tell anyone about the Carol final. It was *killing* me! I wanted to ask my friends if they had finaled (and quite a few of them did!) and I wanted to share it with the world. But I kept my mouth zipped up tight (no small feat for me) and waited not-so-patiently for the announcement on the 27^th. 

3. Good news in one area will not fix the rest of your life—or even fix that part of your life. I had one of my most challenging writing weeks - ever -  in the space between finding out about the Carol final and being able to talk about the Carol final. Awards are awesome and fun, but they don’t actually make it any easier to write your stories, and I don’t know of a single one that will do your laundry. (If there is an award that comes with a laundry service, please someone let me know because I want to win that one bad). Life goes on. The plot line that was kicking your rear an hour before you get a “call” will still be making you crazy an hour later. The dishes still need to be done. The bills still have to be paid. People will still cut you off in traffic. It’s a very bizarre thing to be simultaneously joyful and despondent, but it is possible. 

4. I love to read the Psalms in the summer. I run to the Psalms when I am frustrated and frazzled, and summers are challenging for our family. Children who thrive on routine can struggle mightily in the free-wheeling, carefree days of summer, and that makes it hard on this mama. Without being consciously aware of what I was doing, I just turned to Psalm 1 and started reading . . . and realized I’ve done this before. My Bible is marked up in pens, pencils, and all sort of random notations, but there is nowhere that I can remember what I was feeling when I highlighted a particular passage as when I re-read the Psalms. 

5. The best way to wean yourself off caffeine is S-L-O-W-L-Y. I’ve gone cold turkey before and paid the price. In June, I took a slower approach and cut way back on my caffeine. I still had a few migraines, but it wasn’t anything like before. Now, I’m avoiding caffeine in most things except my morning coffee, and even there, I’m drinking less and going with a half-caff approach.  I’ve even skipped it entirely several times with no drama. I sleep better and don’t crash so much in the afternoon, and more importantly, don’t get the jittery feeling I had been experiencing far too often before I made the switch. And speaking of coffee…

6. Some things are worth the calories. I drank my coffee black for a while, but I just didn’t love it the way I had before. And yes, I could give it up entirely I suppose—maybe try to switch to tea—but I’ve decided that some things are worth the calories. I drink my coffee with a splash (or two) of half & half. I enjoy every sip. I sit on my deck with the Psalms and I get my head on straight before I dive into the morning. Life is too short to say “no” to everything under the sun just because it might be a tiny bit better for you. Some things are worth saying “yes” to for the simple reason that they bring delight to your day. Cream in my coffee is one of those things. 

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What I Learned in April and May

I missed the April version of this post because…well….you can read about that in a minute. So I’m squeezing two months into one.

Here goes...

Cancer Sucks. This isn’t new information, but it was brought home to our family when my Mom was diagnosed with Stage 3C Ovarian Cancer. In the past few weeks, she’s been through major surgery and two of a planned six chemo treatments and she is A.MAZ.ING. She is totally rocking the “no hair” look and hats may become a permanent part of her style going forward. She’s a fighter and she’s battling this cancer with everything she has. 

Prayer Works. Again, not new information, but sometimes you get slapped between the eyes with prayers that you’d given up on ever being answered and then God does it in His own time and His own way and all you can do is stand back in astonishment and know in the core of your soul that “God did that.” 

I have the World’s Greatest Friends. You may think you do, but, I’m very sorry, because you don’t. (Unless you are in the same circle of friends that I’m in, in which case, you’re as blessed as I am). My friends have performed the friendship equivalent of Cirque du Soleil acts over the past few months. Watching my kiddos, bringing food, calling, emailing, texting, praying . . . They have loved me so well.

I really do love knitting. I don’t do it nearly as often as I would like, but I do enjoy it. I need to spend more time with my knitting needles and a little less with Pinterest or Instagram while I’m watching TV. 

It really is an honor to be nominated. You hear people say that all the time about the Oscars or the Emmys, and I have to admit I’ve often wondered if it is true. Well, it is. When I got the word the Covert Justice had been named a Selah finalist I couldn’t believe it. I never for minute believed I would win it, I was just thrilled to see my name in the same space as my mentor. (See this post for more info).

It’s fabulous to win. I had the closest thing to an out of body experience that I’ve ever had when Covert Justice actually WON the Selah award. I had one of those, “wait, was that MY name” moments and then one of those “I hope I didn’t hear that wrong and am making a huge fool out of myself” moments as I walked back to the stage. If there were bubbles over my head filled with my thoughts all anyone would have seen was, “What?” “Really?” “Did I hear that right?” “I wonder when they’ll realize they tallied the votes wrong?” “Is this really happening?” “I hope I don’t trip” “HOW did this happen?” and “I can’t believe it!” The best thing about the evening was that I didn’t have to make a speech because it would have been a disaster.

Reading outside my usual genre is something I need to do more often. I write romantic suspense and it is my favorite genre to read. I’ve never understood people who only read one genre, but over the years I’ve found my own reading frame narrowing, not by choice but necessity. There are only so many hours in the day! But over the past couple of months I’ve picked up a couple of fantstic books and while I certainly didn’t learn anything about how to better write a suspense novel, I hope the way the authors laid their stories on the page—with unique structures and prose so beautiful I often had to stop and savor the words—will inform my own writing in ways I can’t yet know.

Middle School isn’t so bad after all. I cannot begin to tell you how I dreaded making the transition to middle school with our daughter. A new school, new kids, new teachers. So.Much.New. But she has thrived. She loves it so much that we are all dreading the long days of summer ahead. She particularly enjoyed all her Special Olympics activities—especially cheerleading. That little bitty one in the front? That’s my girl.

Chalk Pastels are cool. I heard about chalk pastels on a podcast a few weeks ago and promptly ordered a small set. They are cheap and require nothing more than paper and some baby wipes for cleanup. I saved them for a day when we needed a new activity and my boys LOVED it. They drew apples, pumpkins, clouds, tornadoes, BB8 (from Star Wars: The Force Awakens) and then went wild creating their own masterpieces. I don’t consider myself an artist, but this is something we can do. Definitely worth checking out if you need a rainy day activity with your crew this summer. 

I learned so much more, but this post is already ridiculously long. What did you learn this month?

Grace and peace,

Lynn

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Make the Jump

I’ve been asking God to “Edit At Will” (you can read my last post here) and this week He took out His holy red pen and told me it was high time to MAKE THE JUMP. 

Let me explain.

I love Star Wars. 

I’m not a complete nerd about it. I haven’t read all the books. I don’t know all the backstories. I can’t remember the name of every planet. But I do enjoy the movies and I’ve enjoyed sharing them with our boys. We watched Star Wars: A New Hope a few weeks ago, and one scene jumped out at me in a way I never expected. 

Side note #1 - If you don’t think God can speak to you through ANYTHING, I would like to remind you about a guy named Moses and one burning bush. God can and will use things in your day-to-day life to speak TRUTH into your soul if you’ll pay attention. 

Side note #2 - Don’t worry if you hate this stuff. I promise it will make sense in a minute, even if you’ve never seen the movies. (Although, if you haven’t, can we talk later?)

Anyway, in this scene, our favorite characters are on board the Millennium Falcon (that’s a very fast spaceship for those who don’t know) and they are being chased down by Imperial cruisers (the bad guys). Young Luke Skywalker is questioning why Han Solo (the captain of the Millennium Falcon) isn’t making the jump to light speed. 

You can watch the clip here: 

Ben Kenobi: How long before you make the jump to lightspeed?

Han Solo: It'll take a few moments to get the coordinates from the navicomputer.

Luke Skywalker: [frantic] Are you kidding? At the rate they're gaining—

Han Solo: Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, boy! Without precise calculations we could fly right through a star or bounce too close to a supernova and that'd end your trip real quick, wouldn't it?

I’ve been thinking about this clip for days, because you know what else I seem to think isn’t like dusting crops? 

Life.

Sadly, I’ve come to realize this is how I approach much of my life. I’m anticipating making the jump into the unknown and I’m terrified I’ll run into obstacles. To mitigate the danger, I plan—obsessively—and far too often I never make the jump.

Millennium Falcon 

I don’t have the Millennium Falcon’s navicomputer. I have a Bullet Journal and a bunch of colored markers. I have the type of personality that enjoys making lists. I’m the kind of control freak that wants to plan things days/weeks/months in advance and finds great comfort in my plan. 

The problem isn’t with the planning. Planning is smart. We serve a God who came up with the most elaborate and glorious plan ever conceived. I don’t think God is anti-plan.

The problem comes when I keep trying to land on a plan that will help me avoid failure, and until I find the perfect plan, I remain stagnant. Pretty sure God is anti-stagnation.

I’m thinking about moving forward.

I’m dreaming big dreams.

I’m imagining a bright future.

But I’m going nowhere fast.

God did not call me to go nowhere. He didn’t redeem me to live out my life without making an impact for Him. He hasn’t left me here to think about doing things for Him. He actually expects me to DO them. He expects me to use my brain (hello navicomputer) and then he expects me to MAKE THE JUMP.

Maybe I’m the only one, but I don’t think so. My guess is that as you’ve read this you’ve come up with at least one thing, and maybe a whole list of things, you’ve been delaying. 

Maybe it’s a ministry you need to jump into. Maybe it’s a story you need to write. Maybe it’s a business you need to start. Maybe it’s a class you need to take. Maybe it’s a neighbor you need to talk to. Maybe it’s more about your health or your diet because you know you can’t serve effectively when you can’t even walk up a flight of stairs without gasping for air. 

I don’t know what yours is. 

I know what mine is, well, are. 

I know I’ve done more than enough planning to avoid the major catastrophes. I’m not in any danger of bouncing too close to a supernova and you probably aren’t either. 

Jumping may take us out of our comfort zone.

At this point, the jump may mean things get hard. It may take me out of my comfort zone. It may make me sweat (literally and figuratively). Jumping now will probably mean hitting a few bumps, scraping some knees, and probably being embarrassed at least a time or two. 

But the alternative is unacceptable. I’d rather risk the jump now than find myself blown out of the sky before I ever have a chance to see what God has out there for me in the “hyperspace” of His will for my life.

Anyone want to make the jump with me? 

Proverbs 16:9 - The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.

Click to Tweet - Is it time to Make the Jump? Lessons on faith from Star Wars!  

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Edit At Will

For the past several years, I’ve been writing a monthly post for my dear friend Edie Melson’s amazing blog, The Write Conversation. I send it to her a few days in advance (ok, sometimes one day in advance) and I always include these words in my email …

Edit At Will.

I don’t want to publish junk. I certainly don’t want to publish junk on her blog. I’m writing for her, and if she doesn’t like it or has any suggestions to make it better I want to hear them. 

She’s never sent anything back for a rewrite, but she does reformat the work to make it visually appealing on her site. She adds gorgeous photos and when she’s done with it the finished product is polished and (I hope) represents her well.

That’s why I say “edit at will.” I’m not writing these posts for my audience. I’m writing them for hers, and as such I want her to be pleased and feel like the words reflect her mission.

I was thinking about those three little words the other day in a different context.

I was thinking that those three little words—edit at will—should be my prayer.

Every day. Every schedule. Every event. Every (gulp) plan.

Lord, please, edit at will.

Change whatever needs to be changed.

Polish my life until it shines.

Help me be a beautiful and true reflection of You.

But it’s so hard.

It’s a sad truth, but it’s easier for me to give my friend free rein over my words than it is for me to give the God of the Universe free rein over my life. 

The first day I prayed that? Oh yeah, you guessed it. My day ran off the rails before 8AM. By lunchtime I was staggering around like an outmatched fighter desperate to hear the bell. And I had hours and hours to go. When I remembered my prayer from  the morning, I started laughing. Not in a “ha-ha that’s funny” way. It was more of a deranged, one step away from a full-blown panic attack kind of way.

Really, Lord? Because if this is what I’m going to get when I pray this way— 

But then I thought about it a little more.

That crazy day? It would have gone that way regardless of my prayer. The difference came when it dawned on me what was happening (several hours later than it should have). I was able (slowly) to regain some perspective.

Was this ridiculous day going wrong? Or, maybe, was it going exactly right?

Was it falling apart, or was it falling into place?

It looked nothing like what I’d been expecting, but I’m not God. I couldn’t predict the day. He could. He knew before it happened. He was already there in the crazy and upheaval. He wasn’t surprised at all. He was ready to help me, to redirect my path in a way that would bring Him the most glory. 

I still don’t know why the day went nuts. I do know that when I looked back at my calendar for the week I discovered something very interesting. The things that didn’t get done that day that went upside down? They all got done later in the week. The only negative repercussions were my own issues with not being able to say, “I got everything done today.” 

I’m trying to pray this more often. Some days go off without a hitch. Most don’t. But when the wacky Wednesdays hit on a Thursday, I’m hearing that still small voice in my soul whispering, “We talked about this. Remember?” 

I wish I could tell you that I’m now cool, calm, and collected all day long no matter how the day goes. I’m not there yet. (Just ask my kids).

But I’m asking God not only to edit my day, but to edit me as well. To illuminate the darkness in me, the fears, the desperate need to control everything. To eliminate the junk and reformat me into someone that represents Him well and makes Him look good. To help me live my life in a way that makes others want to know Him.

Most of all, I’m asking Him to help me remember that my life is not my own. I’m not here to fulfill my own purposes, but His. 

So I ask again . . . Father, edit at will.

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